Dayani

[Haraio]

Hello people^^

Just thought I would share a little from mine and Nat's relationship, about something that is affecting our relationship to a great degree. I'm sorry if I put this in the wrong forum^^ In that case, could any of the mods please move this to the appropriate forum? Thank you

Due to the situation of our relationship, the fact that we are so far apart (half the world, in fact), I think you'll agree when I say that we're not gonna have kids together any time soon. Nat has kids of her own, and I really enjoy looking at her interacting with them when we talk together over the cammie. I'm a guy who really want to have a family, and I want to have a family with Nat^^

So one day we actually got into the topic of baby names, and we both agreed on some nice names in the case of boy or girl. Nat was really the one coming up with the names, and I loved them from the first moment^^ Ever since, those names have sort of generated their own personalities in our conversations. Especially the girl name that Nat came up with has become very appearant in our life (Name of the thread, if you didn't guess ).

That name has become something very dear to us, like the image of a child between me and Nat. We often use Dayani as a figure in our conversation, almost like roleplaying. But she is far more to us than that. To us, she is almost like the 'guardian angel' of our relationship, if you like. Sometimes when we argue and we don't see a solution, her name works as a reminder of why we love eachother. It's as if we can't stay angry at eachother at all when thinking about the child that we want to have together.

So, I was wondering: Has anyone else, during long-distance relationships, had 'imaginary children' that have greatly affected your relationships? I know that to me and Nat, Dayani has played a major part in our love^^

 

[J 27]

It is not a name as much as a "she." Occasionally S will say "she would be so cute with curly thick hair like mine, but blonde like yours." S does believe if we ever had a child it would be a little girl, for some reason she believes that with all her heart.

but us having a child is a mute point, as she is taking the steps to get fixed. But yes, we have a "guardian angel" also.

 

[Rozie]

I wouldn't say that we have gone as far as to name a child and incorporate a particular "person" into our visions about the future, but we've speculated on what a child of ours would look like and have batted around some names. We imagine a dark curly haired roly-poly little Hispanic looking girl (toddler) and on occasion we have been in the mall and have seen just such a child and we poke each other and say "There she is!" I think its just the idea that we belong together and we want to share any major life experiences that drives this. Not the other way around; having a child together doesn't drive the relationship. But, there are all kinds of glue that make people commit to one another, and this is some of your glue. :yes:

 

[Hao]

*tackles Haraio*

I dont believe you posted this. *chuckles* you are cute you know that?:kiss2:

Yes we do have dreams dont we? Well the dreams that we held till now is Dayani. Each time we will make her character alive by asking what is she doing and did she eat or not or even asked who will be the one that will bring her over to the kindergarten. The best part is that we would be talking about her hiding or even take away Haraio's warhammer figures. Or even hide them under her bed!:tongue0013:

Fantasies that we tried to make it real as we know that Dayani will be the one that actually will bring us together in our life...even we so much far apart...:kfluffy:

 

[Angel]

We did do that. :yes:

I had 3 children, he had 0. We lived 2500 miles apart and our age difference very close to yours (18/32 when we met).

During a silly conversation we said if we ever had a girl/boy what we would name her/him.

We tossed names about but never found one that we really liked.

Then one day my fiance, "A" wrote on his foot our initials with and 'n' linking them. (Both our names start with A.)

= A n A = <---- much like that right there. I tried to find the photo that he took of his foot that day, but couldn't.

When I saw the picture I mentioned how it looked like Anna and if only it sounded Mexican (because I wanted an ethnic sounding name) we could name our child that.

So my fiance put a tilde over the n and our dream child's name was born, Aña (pronounced Awn-Ya).

It was our dream. One we created together out of our relationship and the name was sacred to us. It was the representation of our dream and the name was the 'trophy' to that dream.

It was silly I'm sure to many which is why we rarely told people how much it meant to us. Honestly neither ever believed that one day it could or would come true. And for me I didn't want people to call him immature or me childish for the dream.

When he moved here to give our relationship a real life shot, Aña and the dream went to the backs of our minds while we tried to figure out if we could handle the daily pressures of life together.

One day I found out I was pregnant (unplanned) and forgot the dreams and words we once spoke. I was angry and bitter that the time wasn't right. I contemplated abortion and ending the relationship.

Good thing Aña (our dream) was more determined to come to life than my fears to destroy that dream.

And our dream, Aña, is real now. She's 14 months old and her name is a special reminder of the path we travelled to her. (You've seen her in the Ageless babies thread.)

Keep Dayani alive in your hearts and conversations. I look forward to one day seeing you post pictures of your dream as well.

Hugs and love to both of you from one dreamer to another.

 

[J 27]

Well more I was thinking, more I remembered. We do have a name for a girl. Jamie Ann. My name is Jamie and her middle name is Ann. She says no matter what she always wants to have a Jamie in her life, and to be able to say my name. If we had a girl, that is what she wanted to name it.

 

[joelstrouble]

What a sweet thread.

Ditto!!!

Joel and I never had any "named kids" when we were LD, I love ther way the two of you talks and communicates (what little I have seen here on AL), it reminds me of the time Joel and I talked when we were LD.

 

[Haraio]

*ish tackled by Nat* ACK!

Hey, of course I had to put this up^^
Cause Dayani is important to us^^

*Dayani runs up behind Nat and puts a 'kick me'-note on Nat's back before running away giggling*

You see, this is how we keep the dream about Dayani alive in our hearts. We always include her in our conversations, and we even talk about who is gonna take her to the kindergarden and make her dinner. So for example when I'm on the bus home from school, I sometimes get a message from Nat saying something along the lines of this:

Hi baby, remember to pick up Dayani from the kindergarden. I'm making spaghetti for dinner. I love you so much *insert kissy smilie*


That is what we do all the time. We love including her in our conversations, cause she is our dream for the future. Our greatest dream is to live together and have a family together, and she keeps us going^^
:kiss2:

 

[grumpysgirl]

I know we have names as well
Logan is a big one for us...

 

[Angel]

*ish tackled by Nat* ACK!

Hey, of course I had to put this up^^
Cause Dayani is important to us^^

*Dayani runs up behind Nat and puts a 'kick me'-note on Nat's back before running away giggling*

You see, this is how we keep the dream about Dayani alive in our hearts. We always include her in our conversations, and we even talk about who is gonna take her to the kindergarden and make her dinner. So for example when I'm on the bus home from school, I sometimes get a message from Nat saying something along the lines of this:

Hi baby, remember to pick up Dayani from the kindergarden. I'm making spaghetti for dinner. I love you so much *insert kissy smilie*


That is what we do all the time. We love including her in our conversations, cause she is our dream for the future. Our greatest dream is to live together and have a family together, and she keeps us going^^
:kiss2:

You two met on a roleplaying forum as well, right?

So in this case it would only make sense that you would develop this type of 'spiritual entity' to represent your relationship.

I think whatever brings you comfort over the miles is fine by me.

*Hands Dayani a lollipop, and watches her skip back to Håkon and Nat*

 

[Rozie]

Because of our age gap, our babies will probably remain in our imagination until we incorporate them into a cartoon (his work) or children's books (my dream.) Never-the-less, I think what you do is something that comes very naturally for role players. Keep it up..it is good to see people who really enjoy each others company...even when one of them exists only in imagination. If we didn't have imagination, life would be a bore!

 

[Haraio]

@Grumpysgirl:
Logan? Yeah, that's a mighty cool name^^
Reminds me that it's been a while since I saw X-men
jk jk^^ I'm glad we're not the only ones who have imaginary children *chuckles*

@Angel:
Yesh! We met at a Anime Roleplaying forum that Nat runs (Where we're both admins; don't ask what I did to get my rank ), and I think you're right, cause RPing comes very natural to both of us^^

@Rozie:
Thank you for your kind words^^
And yes, I really enjoy Nat's company. Right now she's sleeping, and I miss her so much T.T I wish I was there with her

 

[Athena83]

That's a cute story, Haraio.
My husband and I do the same thing, sort of. We are in a LDR for now, until Christmas, and one of the fun things we like to do is what you two do, imagining what our children will be like, what they might look like etc.

We've even discussed names, and sometimes if we're talking about something we might say: Oh, what do you think Rohan or Laura would think if they knew their parents talked about this, or did that? How will it be on Sunday mornings, when the kids will come jumping into bed with us, maybe we will sing songs or read stories?:tongue2: Talking about different scenarious with our future kids connects us more despite the distance.

Dayani is a very nice name btw., where does it come from?

 

[Haraio]

Hmm, you are doing the same thing to Athena? It seems like many LDR-couples here do it^^ Nice, I was afraid we were the unnormal ones XD

We always think alot about different scenarios in the future and what Dayani would be doing? Me and Nat want to get a red house where we can live, and if we can't find a red house we'll paint it red! And we imagine Dayani would be claiming a small spot of the wall for herself *chuckles* I can imagine little Dayani, maybe 3 or 4 years old, with the big t-shirt so she won't mess her clothes. Gawd, I bet she would have more paint on herself than on the wall *chuckles* Then she would probably paint on us too <.<;;

Hmm, where the name Dayani came from? Well, me and Nat were discussing baby names, and we both wanted to have a girl (Nat has three girls already, so I don't understand why she wants another one But I want one!^^), and Nat came up with the name Dayani. Then I asked: "What if it's a boy?"
So then we came up with the boy name, Daniyal. We both want to have two kids, since one is too few and three is too many <.<;; At least to me XD
So, then we had to take into account the chances that there might be two girls or two boys. Thereby, the names Haikal and Haraini (compare to the name of my account here XD). But lately, we decided that we want to have middle names on our kids, so we basicly combined the names^^

So, if we get a boy and a girl, their names will be Dayani Haraini Ankervold and Daniyal Haikal Ankervold (Yes, my surname, since Nat made all the names ). Cute names, huh?^^

*tackles Nat* I want to make a baby now! :tongue2: